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Loving Kindness

Mindfulness and Metta Meditation

Please try to avoid and control STRESS,
Here is some home care advice to my clients:

   The traditional forms of Buddhist meditation, mindfulness and loving-kindness, are designed to train the mind to meet the world with a positive disposition. The self, thus equipped, would not easily succumb to stresses and may even be able to turn them into growth factors that further add to the self’s positive cognitive and emotional framework.
   This mind-training program is traditional termed Bhavana in Buddhist philosophy. It refers to mental cultivation and development. Aims at freeing the mind of impediments as anger, hatred, sloth, worries and restlessness.
   By cultivating such qualities as concentration, awareness, intelligence, will, energy, analytical faculty, confidence and joy, the meditator can gain mental calmness and tranquility in terms of inner peace or happiness and reach the highest wisdom free from mental impediments.  
   Sometimes you can be aware of the feelings of fear or anger as they rise in you: here is the stressful situation, let me deal with it! Tune in to your breathing and center yourself.

   Bhavana means mental cultivation. Untrained mind is fickle, unsteady and difficult to control. It is called “monkey mind”. Mind is attracted towards various attachments, people and wordly things. Because these things are impermanent, when they disappear the untrained mind becomes disappointed, sad and angry. Bhavana aims to realize the nature of the wild mind and purify it of negative thoughts and disturbances as hatred, ill-will, indolence, worries and restlessness. Bhavana is the cultivation of qualities as concentration, awareness, intelligence, will, energy, joy and tranquility.     When people are fully aware of their mind, they may perceive their thoughts and feelings as being separate from themselves.
    It is our consciousness that is directly responsible for dissatisfaction and joyfulness. The ultimate causes are internal, not external. The cause of suffering is that unwholesome cravings generate anger, selfishness, cruelty or restlessness. The opposite factors are wholesome desires: loving kindness, compassion, sympathy and equanimity, which can negate unwholesome thoughts.
   People carry their unwholesome desires  due to ignorance.
It is the delusion tricking beings by making life appear permanent, and preventing them from seeing that everything in reality is impermanent. In this way, the sense of self-ego arises in people: their strong ego blocks them from seeing the world as impermanent.

   With strong self-ego, pure compassion and sympathy cannot dwell in the mind, which becomes selfish and self-centered, and this state create restlessness, hatred, jelaousy and cruelty.
   Everything in the universe is subject to decay and change and when this happens, people get disappointed, upset, frustrated and angry if attached to these things. This is called suffering, cause of stress. Sensations such as hatred or love arise, persist, disband and are not permanent.The eye processes images, and the mind creates the reactions of attachment, aversion or neutrality to these images. If one becomes attached to something or someone, love follows this attachment, and if one becomes averse, hatred, anger and jealousy may follow. In watching and observing these events of mental phenomena, one must become aware of his perceptions.

   Complete mindfulness helps us to manage our daily lives, become free of discriminations, violence and abuse towards others and reducing our mistakes. The meditator should not try to suppress these obstacles, but instead should think about their conditions.
   Practice of mindfulness of breathing is simple and easy when nervous or excited.
   Some people grow up in a wealthy and privileged environment, and thus have many opportunities to fulfill their desires.
   Never satisfied, they are continually trying to satisfy more and more desires, because they do not appreciate what they already have in the present moment. Dissatisfied with life, their minds are restless. Conclusion is that dissatisfaction is the nature of sensous desires.
   Often dissatisfaction and emptiness cloud the moment, and the mind is continually longing for the illusory future. To the extent we live in our thoughts for the future, we neglect to live in the present.
  We should perceive anger as the cause of stress, and the cause of the anger is in the mind.
   The untrained mind is unstable and shaky and cannot maintain the concentration on a single object or subject for even a short period of time. For the undisciplined mind, one thought comes and is quickly overpowered by the next thought. The mind jumps all over and is unable to settle down. The mind cannot concentrate on a single object.
   When one experiences doubt, the mind is foggy and cloudy. He will lack confidence and direction. The mind jumps all over, keeps running off to fantasies and desires, and is easy distracted and frustrated. First become aware of the mental objects without suppressing them or indulging in them.
   Non-attached awareness is the first step of mindfulness training, recognizing when the hindrances are present.
  1. Sit and observe the thoughts and feelings, not being anxious for result
  2. Do not hurry with the practice. When desire comes up, see it’s non permanent nature and  do not store images,
    opinions and thoughts that come up
  3. Let thoughts come and go, accept things as they are
  4. Be patient, no shortcuts for the result, take time to concentrate on here and now
  5. Learn not to get upset over flows and failures
  6. See problems of life as challenges, apply mindfulness to confront the negative side of life, see them as
    opportunities to learn and grow

   Metta means loving-kindness, friendliness, benevolence, fellowship, fraternity, harmony, inoffensiveness and peace, strong thoughts for the welfare and happiness of everyone, both oneself and others, without asking for anything in return.
   Through metta one refuses to be offensive and renounces bitterness, resentment and enimosity of any kind. Metta meditation goes beyond the ego self, generate emphaty and appreciate better the feelings of sorrow and pain, joy and a in others.
   All living beings fear being harmed, life is dear to all, one should neiter hurt nor kill not cause to hurt or kill anyone.

   Generate within oneself a warm hearted feeling of friendliness, emphaty, symphathetic joy and love, which enhance the ability to overcome social barriers as race, religion, gender, age and social status, and avoid feelings of resentment, frustration, insecurity and hopelessness, which are the direct causative factors of stress.
   Metta as universal love has to transcend and overcome personal likes and dislikes. Thus, with the mind of metta, we can show compassion even towards those whom we dislike because they are unfriendly to us.
   In this way one can reduce one’s own ego and selfishness.
   Unfriendliness can only be overcome by our friendliness, compassion and forgiveness.
   May he have no angry feelings towards me, may he be free free from danger, may he be well and happy just like I have these feelings towards myself.
   When one’s mind is calm, free from anger and one has emphaty and compassion, his conduct will not disturb the society. Through such peaceful conduct one’s mind becomes relaxed and full of positive energy, and allows one to form healthy relationships with one’s  fellow human beings.    When loving-kindness is set up in the mind, one does not look at others as actual or potential threats.

   Thus one relaxes and approaches other with friendliness.


  1. Non-hatred and sharing of joy and happiness for all
  2. Non-hostility and the irradiating light of symphathy and empathy and without using harsh words and with using
    wholesome speech
  3. Restraining from destructive, anti-social behavior and building harmony and friendliness
  4. Without conceit and with equanimity
   If one practices metta he considers everybody as his friend. If there is a sympathetic feeling of friendliness with others, this generates compassion, a deep understanding of the sorrow and pain in others as if they were one’s own.   
   By virtue of sympathetic feeling of friendliness generated by metta, one can show and celebrate others’ success and good fortune, even though being bothered by jealousy and envy.
   Mudita is the ability to feel other’s joy as if it were one’s own. Equanimity is the response to both negative and positive events with calm neutrality. When meditating on loving kindness, then compassion and sympathetic joy in that order, upekkha or equanimity will naturally occur of it’s own accord.
   When we develop and maintain metta, we learn not to get upset at the behavior of others, and do not develop anger towards them.

   Visualize yourself in a happy mood picture. Maintain this positive image and mood in your meditation. A person in a happy mood cannot become angry or harbor negative thoughts and feelings. When one gets used to the practice both mentally and physically, positive images and feelings will naturally occur in one’s daily activities, as during work, studies and resting.
   May I be well, happy and prosperous.
   May no harm, no difficulties and no problems come to me. May I always meet with success. May I also have patience, courage, understanding and  determination to meet and overcome inevitable difficulties, problems and failures in life.
   One should concentrate one’s positive thoughts first on himself, then on those close to himself, and then towards those increasingly distant from him.
   The mindfulness cultivation that originated with the Buddha is not the religion but a moral philosophy,  psychology and psycho-therapy.
   Compassion represents love, charity, kindness, tolerance and such noble qualities on the emotional side, or qualities of the heart, while wisdom stands for the intellectual side or the qualities of the mind.
   There are two qualities one should develop equally: compassion (karuna) and wisdom (panna) on the other. Loving kindness meditation has the ability to strengthen one’s positive relationships with others, such as parents, teachers and peers. When reduce your ego, becomes easier to share feelings and emotions with others, such as worries, pains, joys and happiness with others.

all photos were taken in Chiang Mai, Thailand

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